I can normally push you right out of my heart, but I'm too tired to fight -- February 2017 (DONE)

I rolled my eyes at him.  "Gee, thanks for thinking of me," I muttered sarcastically.  It felt like we were nearly digressing back into our school aged selves, starting to bicker about things.  I shook my head and sighed.  "I do have something that could possibly get me on the inside..."  I had never shown anyone my Dark Mark that was outside of the Death Eaters' ranks.  It was not something I was proud of having on my arm.

I raised my eyebrows at him.  "What are you talking about?" I inquired.  I furrowed my brow slightly, wondering what on earth he was speaking of.

I guess it never became more than a rumor that I had gotten the Dark Mark.  Of course, we had received it after we had graduated, so that did not necessarily surprise me.  I took a deep breath.  "I'm not sure if it'll work, but I had to become one of them at one point," I said quietly.  "I have the only ticket that may even get someone inside..."  I did not want to say the words 'Dark Mark' nor did I want to show Dean.  It had faded through the years, but one could still make it out.

I sat back in the chair looking at Draco, tapping my fingers against my glass slightly.  "So you'd end up pulling a Snape?" I asked, understanding completely what he was getting at.  There had always been rumors, but I never knew for sure and it really was not any of my business.  I had enough to worry about at that time.  "Do you think that would work?  Riddle might be expecting something like that."  But we did need to know what was going on on the inside.

I shrugged, not entirely sure.  "It would be worth a shot, wouldn't it?  I mean... I'm really good at lying and keeping secrets -- I have almost my entire childhood and teenage years at least to back me up with that," I said, shaking my head slightly.  This was the most I spoke of things like that to someone outside of the Malfoy family.  "And, if the worst happens, Ian is old enough to realize that I was trying to work for the good rather than the dark side."

I stared at Draco.  He was willing to risk his life to bring Riddle down?  I ran a hand through my hair.  "You do what you feel is necessary... but it could work," I said.  I did not want to say that I agreed with him on it because I did not want anythign that happened to him to be on my hands.

I nodded at Dean.  "It would work," I said quietly.  "I would make sure it did... somehow."  I could hide my true feelings and intentions.  I did for years... I was a Slytherin.  I would do anything to get what I wanted, right?  And I wanted to bring Riddle down... really, the entire clan of Death Eaters I wanted to bring down as well.  That whole regime ruined my entire life.

"Then... well, we need to figure out how to infiltrate them without him getting suspicious," I said quietly, trying to think of a game plan.  But I had no experience in these matters except to fight it.  Perhaps Malfoy had an idea...  I hoped.  This seemed to be his area of expertise.

I sighed, leaning back in the booth a little bit.  "I'll just wait until he calls a meeting... I can formulate some sort of story -- I heard my father spin tales to the Dark Lord quite often," I said softly, hating to admit any of this to someone outside of the Malfoy family.  The thing was, Dean probably already had his suspicions and now I was confirming them.

I frowned slightly and wondered to what extent Draco had to deal with the Dark Lord before now.  I could not believe it.  "Only if you think that you want to do that... it's rather dangerous," I said.

I nodded.  "I know exactly how dangerous it was -- Snape did it for years.  and he is the only person I had truly admired in my young days," I explained to dean.  I knew what was at stake if I tried to do this... but it was worth it.

Hmm.. he had a point about that -- snape did do it for years.  I was getting an insight into Malfoy that I never knew was even there... it was weird.  "Well... good.  I guess it's time to think about the rest of the new Order, then..." I mused, wondering who could possibly take over that like Dumbledore did.  I would have automatically thought Uncle remus, but with everything going on... he was nowhere near good enough to be doing anything like that.

I leaned back in the booth slightly and looked at Dean.  "The rest of the Order?" I questioned.  I guess I had been involved on the darker side of things for too long.  "What else needs to be thought of?"

I sighed slightly and looked at Draco.  "Well... we need to let others know that we're going to go up against the Dark Star and his death eaters.  That means that we're going to need help.  And we will definitely need to get people..." I said to him.

Of course.  That made complete sense... the Dark Lord hated the Order back in the day.  "I'm guessing we could go to the ones who are left that were in the original Order... and then recruit others," I said logically.