For the life of me, I cannot believe we'd ever die for these sins -- February 2017

I wanted to talk to Remus after Lyla was back at school for a few days.  I have not talked to Remus since we snapped at each other a couple weeks back.  I walked into the castle, looking for him.  I found him in the Great Hall walking out with a couple of crumpets and a cup of tea.  I approached him, glad most of the students were not around.  Must be during class -- most of the kids in the hall looked older.  "We need to talk," I said quietly.  I already felt the residual anger from the whole ordeal rise up inside of me from just looking at him.

I was a little startled to see James heading my way.  I told Lyla I wanted to speak with her after dinner tonight to get everythign started to help her feel comfortable in teh castle.  I took a sip of the tea and smiled at James the best I could.  "Hey James," I said, trying to ignore the feeling I got from Boris to go after my best mate.  "How's Ly holding up?  I'm going to be talking to her once she's settled back in."  I could not believe how awkward it was to talk to one of my friends.

I tried to stop from glaring at him.  This was ridiculous -- he was Moony after all.  But i could not help it.  He was putting everyone else before my daughter.  That was not okay.  "She's been better," I said snidely.  "That's what I want to talk to you about.  She was extremely hesitant coming back to school... all because he's still wandering these halls."

I sighed heavily.  "Can we talk about this in my office?" I inquired.  There was no way I wanted to get into allof this in the Great Hall or the corridors.

I rolled my eyes.  I followed as Remus led the way to the Headmaster's office.  "Do you think it wise to continue to let him stay here?  Ly i kind of frightened to be in the usually safe corridors of Hogwarts.  And other students aren't safe either.  he's a monster, Remus," I started, unable to keep myself from waiting to get to his office before saying anything.

I took another sip of tea.  He could not wait, could he?  I stopped momentarily to look at James.  "James, he is a kid who made a mistake -- that does not make him a monster.  I'm not saying I agree with what he did by any means.  I care for Lyla a great deal and I would like to hear all of this from her," I said. I knew James was still very angry with me.  i wanted to know these were really Lyla's feelings, not James'.

I was so taken back by what he just said.  I never wanted to hit him more than I did at that moment.  "Remus  He doesn't deserve any more chances!  He is more than someone who made a mistake," I yelled.  I did not care that there were students starting to gather around us.

This was what I wanted to avoid.  "Enough!" I said loudly.  I lowered my voice and steped closer to James so only he heard me.  "James, peole do deserve chances.  What if I never got any chances?  What would have become of me?" I glared at him.  "He has shaped up to be quite a good student now."

I rolled my eye at him.  "I don't care if he ends up becoming Minister of Magic.  He doens't deserve this chance.  Not if my daughter is scared to come back to school.  You know why you're doing this?" I asked.  I was so tired of all of this.

I really wished that I was not holding a cup of tea right now because I would cross my arms.  "Please, enlighten me," I requested, my voice so full of sarcasm it was almost unbearable.

"You succumb to your biggest failing," I explained snidely.  The look on Remus's face made me laugh.  "And your biggest failing is that you need to be liked.  You have this need and it's ruining your relationships with those around you.  Which will definitely eat you alive... and that will bring me great pleasure."  I knew I was being evil, but I honestly did not care.

I stood there, shocked.  utterly shocked.  I wanted to hit him.  "Yeah, well I remember back in the day when it worked in your favor," I said angrily.  boris was not too pleased about any of this.  I backed up a little bit and glowered at him.  "You need to leave now before you say something you'll really regret."  I was so angry.  I could barely contain myself.

I could not believe that Remus threw that in my face.  "I'm not leaving until you tell me that he's no longer at Hogwarts," I nearly yelled.  We had quite a crowd around us... including Lyla.

It was taking all of my self control not to cause James any physical harm.  I have never wanted to hurt one of my best mates like this.  "You need to leave.  Now," I said, trying to stay calm.  "You are not going to tell me how to run my school.  And I will not let you talk this way to me."  There was no way I was going to take this anymore.  It hurt, what was going on.  I could not believe that James threw what he did in my face.  That was not my greatest failing.... he was being ridiculous and I could not handle it anymore.

I scoffed and went to leave... then I had second thoughts.  I turned around and punched him in teh jaw.  "We're done," I said.  I never expected him to fight back.  When he slammed me against te wall, it startled me slighty  "I dont' want to see you near me or my familly at all -- unless it's to help my daughter here at school." I pushed him away from me.  "Now your failing of needing to have everyone like you... you've just lost me."  I turned and left.  I stormed past all of the students and they easily parted for me.  I think they were afraid.