I know you hear me, I can taste it in your tears, holding my last breath - Fall 2018

We were in my office as the boys left. " Em, if you need to ....go ahead.." I said as I wiped my eyes before I started cleaning Remus up. I sniffled as I looked to our friends body. He had lost his battle. Now, because of Boris Remus is laying on my table. I looked to Ember as tears clouded my vision, if there was a way to bring him back I would. I just didn't know what to do. He normally helped us. Especially when James was driving me nuts. He normally would always help me see why he felt the way he did. He was amazing at reading us, which worked to advantage and disadvantage.

" You know....when I found out about Boris....he thought I would have seen him as such a monster...." I told her. Everyone in our family knew about Boris, " He was worried I would tell....or not I don't really know to be honest....I never saw him differently.....it was only a way to help..." I said as I smiled a little bit of reminiscing about him as I was cleaning his face up. Wiping the blood away from his eyes.

I shook my head; Lily did not need to be alone doing this.  I wiped at my eyes and helped her in any way she instructed me.  I smiled slightly.  "That was always his biggest fear... I don't know if he ever truly believed that anyone could ever like him... even after all these years," I said, sadness in my voice about that.  "I found out what he was one night when we were secretly dating... I have a scar from Boris thanks to that... we still joked about it..."  I foudn it so hard to see him like this, yet, despite the pain... it was good to talk about him in his better days.

I smiled to her, " I remember that...and how terrified you both were when James found out....as well as Chloe and Sirius..." I pointed out. Knowing they would be mad but they weren't mad for the reason the two of them worried about. " They're together again..." I said quietly.

I swallowed the sob that nearly rose when Lily said that.  I nodded and took a shaky breath.  "Yes... something that they needed.  They always said they could never live without each other... something we've all said," I responded softly, looking down at Remus.  It looked much more like him the more we cleaned him up.. which made this that much harder.