Scared to death -- Winter 2002

I walked in to check on how Quinn was doing. " Hi Quinn.." I smiled to the little girl sitting on the bed connected to all the wires and monitors. It was terrible that such a little girl had to go through this much. It was heart wrenching. I knew they are filling out the paperwork. All her vitals seemed all right. I put her file down at the edge of her bed. All seemed good, well as good as they could be right now.

I nodded as Bill and Charlie spoke, hearing that Bill was a match was a good thing. Yet, a terrifying thing as well. For the pair of them. I wasn't sure how to handle it. I smiled to the kids as they watched their father go into the room with their uncle as we waited outside. I was not sure how to feel other then somewhat relief. I put my arms on either side of me so I could keep track of the three of them.

I looked at Momma Dora and put a hand on her arm.  "Don't worry," I said to her as confidently as any nine year old could who believed whole heartedly in their dad.  "Dad will be able to help Quinn."

Bill and I finished our paperwork and I saw that Lily was in the room with Quinn.  I walked in, seeing my little girl's face brighten when she saw her daddy -- nearly breaking my heart -- and cleared my throat slightly to announce my presence.  I took hold of Quinn's little hand and looked at the healer.  "We have everything filled out," I said to Lily quietly, kissing my daughter's forehead.

I sat with our daughter as George had our other little one. To hear that there was a match was a hige relief and yet, Aunt Lily said this would be difficult. I squeezed Ren close to me, as I looked to George who had Tori. I didn't know what on earth I would do if I was in that situation.

I looked at Elena and my other little girl, wondering how Charlie was handling any of this.  Him and Bill... and Dora.  I was not sure if I could do it.  It would be highly too difficult.  I tried to give my wife a reassuring smile.

I smiled at the woman and reached out my hand to her.  "Wan' mumma..." I said, scrunching up my face about ready to cry.

I saw my baby had woken up and I went through the process of going to be with her.  I did not want to be away from her at all until the moment she had to go into surgery.  It was just too hard... I was almostmore worried now than before.  "Mama's here, sweetie," I said to my baby girl.

Seth Weasley wrote:I looked at Momma Dora and put a hand on her arm.  "Don't worry," I said to her as confidently as any nine year old could who believed whole heartedly in their dad.  "Dad will be able to help Quinn."

I put my arm around him and pulled him close. Tears playing at my eyes, " I know he will buddy." I said quietly. I was happy they had found a match, yet terrified for them both. I took a deep breath and exhaled. It was for his brother, his niece, he had to do it. Yet, I couldn't push this scared feeling away no matter what. I was happy there was an answer. Charlie is my best friend.

While Charlie spoke to Lily and was in the room with Quinn, I went to Dora and my kids.  I sat down next to my wife and looked at the kids.  "Why don't you all go see if Nan and Pops can get you a treat from the cafe or something," I said to them.  "It's time for some adult talk with your mum, okay?" 

I waited until they were out of ear shot before I looked at Dora.  I took hold of her hand.  "Are you okay with this?" I asked her quietly, trying to judge her reaction.

I was glad that Desi had come in to see Quinn, too.  I put my arm around my wife and kissed her forehead.  "It'll be okay," I tried to assure her, but how could I do that?

I squeezed his hand, " Of course I am....I understand the importance. I'm just......worried." I said with a quick smile. I let out a breath, " It's fine...really. " It was hard to tell him I was scared, I don't like to admit that. I understood why he had to do it. He would do it no matter what. " I'm okay with it."

I held out my hands for Seth and Ros who came over to us.  I was glad that Bill and Dora were talking.  "Would you like a snack?" I asked the kids.

I nodded and brought her hands to my lips, kissing it tenderly.  "I know, Dora, I know," I said to her.  I wanted to her to know in those five words how much it meant to me that she was not going to stand up and say no to this.  I wanted her to know how much she meant to me -- how the kids meant to me.  I wanted her to know that I was scared, too, but that this was just something that I had to do.  I had to do everything I could to protect my brother from any pain, to care for my niece.  "And you know during my recovery.... you don't have to be alone, either.  Take the kids to Mum's... or any of their uncle's or aunt's houses."  I was not entirely sure how long I woudl have to recover in St. Mungo's before being able to go home.  I knew Healer Lily said that it would be quite a few months of recovery... but she did not specify what would be in hospital and what would be at home.

I know they would help, " The recovery isn't what I'm worried about...." I told him. I needed him to know that I was worried with how much it may take for him and Quinn to not be in pain anymore, it was just making sure he came out of it okay.