Before you met me, I was alright but things were kind of heavy, you brought me to life -- Fall 1991

I looked around and sighed, having a hard time finding a susceptible critter.  Then a bird flew overhead and I waved my wand.  I slowly brought the bird down to our level after having slowed it down.  "Here, try it on the bird," I suggested, holding the bird carefully.

I shook my head. "I'm haven't done the actually hex yet. Should I try it now or keep going with the counter-jinx and have you do the hex first?" I asked, knowing Lincoln would know best.

I shook my head at myself.  "Right, sorry," I said, wondering where my mind had gone.  I looked at her.  "Get ready," I said, waving my wand to perform the hex.

"That's okay." I assured him. I would've tried the hex if he wanted. I put my wand at the ready as I watched the bats fly away. I took a deep breath, concentrating on the bird and bats and how much I wanted to prove Father and myself wrong. I inhaled deeply, letting it out slowing, trying to exhale my doubt as well. "Prove them wrong." I said softly before saying the spell and waving my wand. A few bats continued to emerge but fewer then before. A small smile formed before I could stop it, and I had to force it back, as I turned to Lincoln, to make sure he would finish taking the hex off the bird.

With another wave of my wand, the bird was free.  I looked over at Juniper.  "That was a lot better than the last time.  You'll get the hang of this quickly," I said to her.

"You really, think so?" I asked, looking up at him with wide, hopeful eyes. Did he really mean it? I shook my head to clear it. No, I hardly knew Lincoln, I was just as horrible as Father said. "I don't know about that." I said, looking down.

I nodded at her.  "Yeah, you're a natural," I assured her.  "I think the key is to make sure that you don't put too much pressure on yourself... like you're making yourself too tense or something."  I was never good at making myself clear on things like this because I hated talking about anything similar to this.

"Okay." I said, still unsure and hearing the doubt in my voice. "I can try, but what if it isn't me who's putting pressure on me?" I bit my lip, surprised I was saying as much as I was. I shook my head to clear it. "Sorry, never mind. Don't worry about it. Forget I even said anything." I forced a small smile and nodded, "Umm.....okay, I'll try that. Should I attempt the counter hex again?" I hoped to distract him, he didn't need to know about the specifics.

I sighed and shook my head.  "Just try to forget everyone else," I said, though I knew that was harder than anything.  It was none of my business if she was speaking of her brother or family or friends or professors... or anyone.  I would just try to help her out.  "And ifyou feel up to it," I said to her, figuring it would be best to let her have the option.

"Practice makes perfect." I said with a forced smile. I was glad he wasn't asking any questions about who I had been talking about, but Father tried to make me like Draco ever since we were born. He wanted me to keep up with Draco and the more he pushed me to be like him, the more difficult for me it became and the angrier he would get. I shook my head to clear it, took a deep breath and did as Lincoln said, tried to forget everyone else. "If you still want to help me, I'd love to try again."

I nodded at her.  "Of course I'll help," I assured her.  I enjoyed helping others, and she was picking everything up rather quickly.  I liked students like that... it made things a bit easier.  Not that I minded if they were a little slower... everyone was always different.

I smiled up at him. "Thank you, so much." I said sincerely. "I really appreciate all the help, I'm not sure if anyone else would be as patient as you are." I looked around and found a different bird. I pointed it out to Lincoln. "Should we use that bird now?"

I nodded at her.  "Don't mention it," I said to her lightly.  I did not mind helping others -- it made me believe that there were good people out there despite the people that I had to grow up with.  I just did not want to turn into my mother or father.  I tried everything ot prevent that -- this being one of those things.  "Yeah, that is probably a wise idea," I added, waving my wand and easily capturing the bird.

I watched him capture the bird, I was getting use to this part and I trusted him that no animal would get hurt. That I wouldn't hurt an inocent animal. I was starting to get the hang of the spell and I wanted to see if I would be get it right this time. "You think I'll get it this time?" I asked him.

I nodded at her.  "If you focus," I assured her.  "Just clear your mind of all the other stuff that's in there... and you've got this."  I was mainly speaking of her doubts.  Confidence was key most the time in succeeding in magic -- at least that's what I had found in myself.  And it seemed to carry on to the other students I helped.