It's hard to find the perfect time to say something you know is gonna change everything -- May 1998

I knew this was just him blowing off my concern, but there really was nothing I could do about that.  Maybe one day he would learn to trust me enough to be completely open and honest with me.  I smiled the best that I could at him.  "Alright, I'll trust you on that one, Draco," I said quietly.

"Yes, please do," I assured her.  "You have nothing to worry about.  Everything will be figured out and be fine."  I had a feeling that I was going to need Father's vault for this. I knew I could not do it on our own and I knew that I could not count on him.  I was entitled to some of that, right?  So I did not view it as stealing...

I nodded at him.  "Okay," I said, though I was not entirely sure.  "You're not even going to tell your sister about this?"  I found that lightly odd.  I knew they confided a lot in each other.  Why would he not tell her before their parents?

Juniper and I had been planning on leaving after graduation.  How was I going to tell her that I could no longer leave?  It would break her heart.  I would wait as long as possible to tell anyone.  It was the best form of protection for Pansy and the baby.  I shook my head at Pansy.  "No... I'll tell her when I tell our parents," I said, hoping that June would not bring up leaving, but knowing that she would.  If I could get away with not telling our parents, I would, but I knew better.  Father would find out and I did not want to think about what he would do if he did not find out by me.

I sighed, knoing that there was no use in arguing.  "Alright," I said, shrugging.  "But I'm sure she'll be excited when we do tell everyone."  I smiled at him.  "This really wasn't real to me until I told you... saying it out loud makes a difference."

I nodded, taking her hand and squeezing it.  "I just want everything to be in place before people start to find out," I told her softly.  I was sure students would end up realizing that I was more protective of Pansy than ever before, but most were too frightened of me to really argue much.  But that was why I wanted to wait -- to protect Pansy and the baby from any harm.  I knew Juniper would want to help with that, I just did not need her to fret until Pansy and I got things figured out ourselves.

I smiled at him even though I knew there was more to it than what he said.  "I just hope that I'll be able to hide certain things from everyone.  Some students are overly nosy," I said, thinking of my morning sickness.  I was already having issues being in Potions class.  The fumes were unbearable sometimes.  I was just glad that I did not have Divination -- Millie did and she said that it always had incense and whatnot up in that room making her woozy on good days.

I smiled slightly at her.  "I'm sure you'll do fine," I assured her.  I had to figure out how to break it to Juniper that I was no longer leaving at the end of term.  I coul dnot leave Pansy and my baby to fend for themselves, though, as much as I hated to even think it, they may be better off without me being in the picture.  I just could not do that, though.  The kid deserved a better father than I got and I would try my best to make sure that was me.  "Do you need me to get you anything now, though?  Are you feeling alright?" I asked.

I chuckled and shook my head at him.  "No, but thank you," I said simply.  If we were going to keep this a secret, I did not need him to be running around doing my bidding.  People would surely catch onto that, even fi they did not want to say anything to him or me about it.  "We have to act as though there is nothing different between us, Draco... or else people will notice something."

How on earth was I going to do that?  She was pregnant with my baby.  I sighed, running a hand through my hair.  She was right, of course.  We needed to be careful or else people would figure it out.  I looked at her.  "Well, to keep things as normal as possible... I just want to apologize in advance for any of my behavior that may hurt you," I said.  Of course the pain would not be physical, but emotionally I was sure that I would have to hurt her.  And I realized that I probably did that on a regular basis as it was, but I pushed that thought from my mind for the time being.

I laughed slightly, but there was no humor in it.  He was worried about hurting me now?  That just seemed a little counterproductive.  "Draco, it's fine," I assured him.  I always forgave him it seemed.  he was my one weakness that I did not really mind having.  I wanted to know what this would mean for us, but I was almost afraid to ask.  I had to know, though.  "So... what does this mean?  I mean, for us?" I questioned quietly.

I was hoping to avoid that subject for the time being.  What did it mean?  I looked at her. "I'm not going to leave you to fend for yourselves," I assured her.  "I think we should keep things the way they are... I mean, we'll move in togehter and go from there.  Does that sound good?"  I hoped that she was not expecting a proposal or anything.  I did not feel that way about her.

I smiled and nodded. "That's prefect,"I agreed.  I wanted to be with him, but only if he wanted to be with me.  As of right now, we were not really an item... we just fooled around at times.  I think Draco was reluctant to get close to anyone -- for reasons unknown.  It was as if he could not trust someone and I was sure that he was protecting himself just as much as any future girlfriend because he was a murderer and in league with the Dark Lord.  Everyone knew that much.  But I did not care; he truly was not evil... and I wanted to help make sure he knew that.

I was rather relieved that she said that.  "I know Madam Pomfrey knows... but I have a feeling that the other professors are going to find out or at least need to know, too," I said quietly.  "I mean... that way they can be more understanding if you have to miss class or something."  I knew that Pansy would try not to just to keep up appearances, but if she got really sick or something, she may just have to.

I shook my head at Draco.  "I don't want special treatment," I said simply.  "That would definitely get the attention from other students.  We don't have much longer to be having to hide this from the student body... I'll be okay."