The ultimate mystery is one's own self -- Fall 1993

I nodded slightly, stroking the stubble on my chin as I did so.  "And where have you heard these things?" I inquired.  I could feel the atmostphere change slightly; he was getting uncomfortable again.

I squirmed in my seat a little bit, running a hand through my red hair.  "Other students and teachers," I said evasively.  I really hoped that my answer would suffice.

I eyed Evan curiously.  He had the same tell as James when he lied.  I do not think he was completely lying, but there was something he was holding back on or at least not telling the complete story.  "Well, they didn't know your parents, did they?  The teachers, yes, but if you're listening to Proefssor Snape... he's a little biased."

"But the only reason Professor Snape hates James is because he loved Mum," I said quickly, something that Peter had told me.  I felt my eyes widen and bit my lip.  I was not sure if Professor Lupin had known that already or not.  "James sounded like a jerk back then... always picking on Snape and other kids..."

My eyes widened slighlty at what Evan said.  "What was that you said about Professor Snape?" I asked, ignoring for a moment the part about James.  He did tease other kids -- mostly Snape -- but he was not a bad guy, something I would try to get Evan to understand through his time here at Hogwarts.

I shook my head quickly.  "It was nothing," I said.  I avoided Professor Lupin's eyes.  I did not want to see anything that was there and I did not want him to see what I was hiding in mine.

I sighed.  I was not going to opush too much from him today.  "How are you liking your other classes?" I asked, trying a different tactic.

I was startled by the way that Professor Lupin changed subjects that easily.  "Oh, erm, they're going well," I said to him.  "I really like Potions... and, of course, this class."  I smiled at him.

I chuckled. "you odn't have to humor me, Evan.  If you don't like Defense Against hte Dark Arts, I wouldn't mark you down for it," I assured him, lightening the mood.

I was startled into chuckling.  "Oh, I do like it, though," I said to him honestly.  "I'm not lying."  I hoped that he would believe me because it was the truth.

I smiled at Evan.  "I don't think you're lying, EVan," I assured him.  "I just had to give you a hard time.  I'm sorry... it's what your parents and I would have done if they were still here to give my kids a hard time."  I obviously knew that James would have given Will a hard time -- Sirius would do the same thing, too... if he was not on the run.

The thought of that made me smile.  Professor Lupin was treating me the way that he would have treated Mum and James.  And Peter.  "Really?  You do that with the other kids, too?" I asked.

I nodded at him.  "If you ever see Dean -- Sirius's son -- just ask him.  He gets it worse than anyone else," I assured Evan with a smile.

I chuckled slightly.  "He wouldn't want to talk to me, though," I said to Professor Lupin.  I looked down, not wanting to show that I felt ashamed of myself or anything.  I knew that no one in that family would want to talk to me.  Not with me being a Slytherin Potter... it went against everything they all thought.

I raised my eyebrow at Evan.  "And why not?  You're his cousin," I said to him simply.  I knew that look, though.  It was the division of Houses that kept Evan at bay.  "Look, not everyone who is in Slytherin is an evil kid... and not everyone who is in Gryffindor is a brave soul, either."  My thoughts went to Peter, though for a lot of people, their thoughts went to Sirius.  At first I believed what we had heard... but after beign able to talk to Ember and Sirius (of course that was hard enough to get into Azkaban to be able to visit him without being technically family...), I knew better.