The ghost of your disappointment is haunting him -- July 1997

I could not believe what my nephew just did.  Refusing the Dark Lord like that?  I found my brother-in-law in the parlor of Malfoy Maor where the Dark Lord had meetings.  I knew Draco was there someplace.  "Lucius!  Where is he?" I asked angrily.  I put myself on the line for him and he disappointed me so greatly.

I was just as furious as Bellatrix was.  This was supposed to renew the Malfoy's relationship with the Dark Lord, not destroy it further.  "I believe he is in his bedroom.  But he may have left.  I am going to hunt him down.  I have never been so dis--" I was rudely interrupted.

"I don't care, Lucius!" I hissed.  "Leave Draco to me.  You have done enough."  I left Lucius alone and stormed to Draco's room whihc I found empty.  I shrieked and looked out the window.  I saw his blonde hair and I apparated outside behind hi.  I did not want him to see this coming.  I pointed my wand at him and whispered, "Crucio." I watched him fall and writhe on the ground i pain as I walked towards him.

I needed air.  I knew I would be punished for refusig the Dark Mark.  The only reason I was alive was because I had succeeded in my task.  But that did not mean I was not tortured by the Dark Lord.  I was still shaking from the encounter that finished mere hours ago, if that.I was sure that the wounds would heal and the scars would fade, but my memory was still entact.  That night would haunt me forever, as would this.  I would try to hide the pain and injury from June; she need not worry herself.

And that was when more pain hit me.  I fell to the dewy grass, blackness filling my sight.  Except for the last look of Albus Dumbledore, but that too faded as a scream escaped my lips.

I lifted the curse.  I looked at Draco while he pushed himself onto his knees.  I walked towards hi ad kept him i place.  "What on earth were you thinking?" I asked him, glaring at my nephew.

I was panting from pain as my aunt forced me to look at her.  I did not comprehend what Aunt Bellatrix said to me.  When she slapped my cheek, it snapped me out of it slightly.  "I was... protecting myself... for once," I said, straining to focus.

I pushed him down and made him scream again by cursing him with the Crutiatus Curse -- my personal favorite.  I lifted it again.  I could do this all day.  "You selfish little prat!  I am not okay with that!  You will take the mark, if it's the last thing you do," I threatened.

I could not believe what I thought I was hearig.  I had tears in my eyes as I attempted to focus on my aunt's voice.  Though the curse was lifted, the pain was still there.  My bones ached from her torture, my muscles and soft tissues from teh Dark Lord's, and that was barely any of the pain I was feeling.

"Stand up and fight like the man you think you are, Draco," I spat, grabbing his collar and forcing hi to stand.  I laughed at him when he collapsed back to his knees.  "Not so tough now, are you?" I placed my foot on his shoulder and pushed him to the ground.  "You are a disgrace, Draco.  I have never been so disappointed in you." I pulled my wand back when I felt a hand on my wrist.  Lucius.

"Enough.  He is my child to punish," I warned her.  There was no reason for Bellatrix to do my work for me.  She sneered at me, but Apparated off of the property I assumed.  I drug Draco to his feet and up to at least collapse into a patio chair.  I hit him in the jaw.  "I would like to know what you were thinking," I said angrily, my face iches from his.  How could he do this to the family?

I spit out blood onto my father's robes.  That earned me another punch.  "Finally getting... your own hands... dirty for once?" I spat, trying to sound sneering through the pain.  I was so tired of this.  I needed to get out of here.  I did not have much strenght, but I had enough to Apparate a short distance.  I knew MOther and June were around and I did not want Juniper to see me like this.  But where was I to go?

Father had started to lecture me again, though I could barely keep my own thoughts straight, let alone listen to what he was rambling about.  I did nto trust myself to go anywhere farther than my bedroom.  "Oh, Father... shut it," I muttered.  I knew that would elicit another punch, but I was in my bedroom instantly.  I waved my wand to put protection spells aroud my room to keep Father and everyone else out of here before collapsing onto my bed.

I let the tears from the pain fall down my cheeks.  One kid could not handle all of this!  It was too much... all too much.  I laid on my back, hands over my face, sobbing.  I always saw Dumbledore's face so full of patience and understanding of the choice I had to make... his lifeless body falling from the Astronomy Tower.

And if that was not enough, they tried to make me choose the Dark Mark.  When I refused, the Dark Lord tortured me near death.  And now Aunt Bellatrix and Father.  I could not take this anymore.  I opened my eyes, but the tears did not cease.  I just could not keep them closed any longer.  That night replayed over and over in my head.  That haunting flash of green.

I was pacing my room, waiting for Draco to come back. This was taking a long time, too long. I suddenly heard screams from outside my window and ran to it. I saw Draco on the ground and Aunt Bellatrix torturing him. My mind played back the memories of my own experience with her and I was rooted on the spot, my hand absent-mindedly going to my own version of the Dark Mark she had placed there. I started scratching it but no matter what I did, it's always there. I watched as Father came up behind her and stopped her, for which I was grateful. They exchanged a few words then she apparated away. I quickly warded my bedroom with a wave of my wand, the last think I needed was her to come in here to use me against Draco again.

When I saw Father punch Draco, I knew I had to intervene. If Draco had been through what I suspected he already had been, I had to protect him. Aunt Bellatrix was one thing but I could only imagine what happened to him with the Dark Lord. I took a deep breath and apparated to where Father and my brother were. "Father!" I yelled, hoping to distract him from Draco, hoping Draco was strong enough to apparat at least to his bedroom. He turned to me and I saw Draco disappear. A few moments later, a light glowed in his room window for a second before going out, a warding spell. I turned to our a Father who looked furious at me for interpreting him. "You don't need to do that. One of us already has a twisted version of the Dark Mark on them." I held up my left forearm and touched it with the other hand so he could see it. I knew it wasn't a real Dark Mark but I had hoped since the day I had gotten it, that it would be enough to prevent either Draco or I from having to get real ones. Clearly, I was wrong. I knew I should apparat to Draco but I had to see what Father was going to say.

I had turned around when I heard my name being called, hearing Draco Disapparate.  That little coward could not even face his punishment.  I took a few calming breaths and looked at my daughter.  Yes, she did have a version of the Dark Mark thanks to Bellatrix.  I stared my daughter down for a moment, knowing that it took a great deal of courage to stand up to me.  I twisted smile appeared on my lips.  "Juniper, despite knowing better to interrupt me -- especially during a punishment -- it does take an ounce of courage to do.  Your little Mark there is for you, dear.  Not for your brother.  You are not the same person, though the two of you are so keen to believe that.  Draco made his choices and now he has to deal with them," I snapped, turning around to look up towards the bedroom where my son was cowering.  I knew I would not be able to enter -- being seventeen he could use magic outside of school and would have put up a warding spell I was sure.  The only one who may be able to enter would be his sister.

I turned back to her.  "Tell that little coward that you call a brother that do not want to see him except for at meetings with the Dark Lord.  No meals, not even in passing in the halls... and if he does not show up for meetings, he will think this is a walk in the park.  Is that understood?" I asked crisply.  I was more furious with Draco than I ever have been before -- more so than I think I had ever been angry with Juniper... and that was saying something.

My wounds needed redressed after everything that happened outside, but I was in no condition to move.  I was barely conscious; the only reason I had not succumbed to the numbness of unconsciousness was due to always reliving that night.  That terrible, terrible night.  The sobs had at least subsided, meaning that they no longer racked my already painful body.  All I had wanted to do was sit by our fountain away from everyone... lost in my own thoughts when Aunt Bellatrix came out.  I thought I heard voices outside... who was Father yelling at now?  I wanted to get up to make sure that it was not Juniper and, if it was, go stop him... but I could not move.  "June..." I muttered, knowing that she could not hear me wherever she was.  That was when blackness enfolded around me, my hand fell limp over the side of my bed and the last thing I remembered was the sound of my wand hitting the floor and the fleeting thought that I was now defenseless.

"I'm not passing on you stupid message. He probably won't even know who I am if he's still even conscious now." I hoped he was, that was the only way I could get into his room is if he lifted the ward for a moment. I shook my head. "We are different people. He was the golden boy and I was the disappointment. We balanced each other out perfectly and became two halfs of a whole. You causes that to happen Father." As usual, I was trying to take the attention off of Draco. Father seemed furious, more so then I had ever seen before with me.

"He will never become a Death Eater, no matter what I have to do to prevent it." I held up my arm again, this time without the visual, "This is as close to a Death Eater as he will ever become." As much as I wanted to see Fathers reaction I was sure I would hear it no matter what. I apparate to Draco's door and started banging on it, hard. "Draco!" I yelled, "Draco it's June! Let me in!" I was scared that Father would follow me and get into Draco's room. I prayed that he was still awake or that my banging would wake him up long enough to let me in.