I will fight for you, always -- Late Summer 2001 (DONE)

I smiled slightly.  At least she was not just going to leave.  It sounded as if she would be thinking about it.  "Whenever you would like to meet her, I will gladly bring her to you," I said.  Sedona missed her mum.

I bit my lip wondering if I should just do it now.  My parents were ressuring me... and I knew they wanted to go back home.  "Could I meet her today?" I asked quietly.

That was not what I was expecting.  I smiled at her.  "Yeah, we can meet you by the swings so that way you odn't have to deal with seeing everything at the house," I suggested.  I wanted her to come home, but I didd not think it would be a good idea for her.  She was confused and stuff... I did not need to beadding to that.  She wanted to see Dona... baby steps.

I could not believe how nervous I was to meet my own child.  Perhaps it was due to how odd that even sounded.  "Okay," I said, wondering if my parents were right.  woul dI be able to handle this?  I smiled a little and went to go by the swings while Dean left.  What was I going to do when she got here?  Would I even know how to act?

I had Sedona in my arms when I returned.  She was very squirmy in my arms.  I had told her that we were going to see Mum and sh ewas so excited.  She did nto understand why she could not see her.  I walked over to Addison.  "Honey, settle down," I whispered to Sedona.

I saw her and I saw her bright eyes.  She was so beautiful.  Sedona brought tears to my eyes.  Was this how I felt when I gave birth to her and saw her for the first time?  I held out my arms and my little girl squirmed inDean's.  He seemed a little hesitant to let her go,b ut he did.  I kissed her forehead as she wrapped her arms around my neck.

"Mummy!" I squealed, my arms tight around her.  Why was she always gone?  "Miss you!"

I was so happy to see the way Addison was with Sedona.  I had been a little nervous.  I was very excited to see that she at least felt the same about Sedona in her heart even if in her mind she had forgotten.  The scene brought tears to my eyes.

I kissed my baby's cheeks and smiled at her.  It was unbelievable... here was no denying my love for this little girl.  If I was so comfortable with the feeling with my daughter, why was it so hard for me to give in to my feelings towards Dean?  erhaps it's due to having feelings towards Phoenix in my mind and heart belonged to Phoenix... yet there is still something about Dean that got me all flustered.  I could open up to him easily... it was just my logic would not let me follow anything.  I clearly loved him at one point... but how did I love him since fifth year?

We stayed at the park talking... it was mostly about Sedona, but I was happy to do that.  To be honest, it was nice to see that Addie was being great with Sedona.  It was hard to tell what sh ewas thinking.  AFter lunch, dona wanted me and she fell asleep with her head on my shoulder while I carried her.  "Would you like anything else?" I asked Addison.

Running a hand through my hair, I sighed.  "I just dont' know about my parents wanting me to go wtih them," I responded.  I did not have anywhere else to go, though.  I was not going to stay with Dean; I was not comfortable with that.  And though I was of age, my parents would not be happy with that.  It seemed like I was still fourteen and I had to listen to them.

That was a good sign.  I wanted to help her figure out what was best, but it was not m place to do that quite yet.  "What all i sthe proposal exactly?" I asked her, shifting my daughter's weight slightly without waking her up.  I just wanted to know what I would be up against in the fith to keep Addie -- or even Sedona.

The worry was evident in his eyes.  "They want me to go with them," I explained.  "They told me they'd arrange for everything so we both see Sedona... I don't knwo how long they'd want me to stay.  I'm thinking that it'd be the safest thing for me to do..."  I sighed and looked at Sedona.  I reached out and touched her sleeping head.  "I just don't know if I could be so far from her now... and there's no way I'd even fathom anyone suggesting taking her wiht me.  She deserves both parents."

I wondered what I could say to help her.  "You have a choice," I said quietly.  Everyone has a choice.  There was no reasn she could not choose.

"I don't feel like I do," I answered.  I really did nto feel like I did.  There was no point in arguing with my parents.