Find a way to smile and never let it get away...TBD

I put a hand on her shoulder.  "Here... let me help you up, then, dear," I said, wishing I could help her more than I could.  "I know, I know... it's hard to think of now, but you could always try again.  And you could take comfort in the little boy upstairs... he may help you right nowmore than you may think."

Smiling a bit, she knew just what to say to make you be able to forget what was wrong in the first place. " He was so excited for another little brother or sister....we'll just have to tell him it will be a little later...." I said quietly. It was difficult to really put these thoughts together.

Seth Weasley wrote:As Dad and I walked up the stairs to the blanket fort, I realized that something was wrong.  I stopped and turned around on one of hte small landings.  "Dad... why are you so sad?" I asked, seeing that he had a bit of a frown on his face.  I hoped that it was not because of omething I did.

I wanted to put a smile back on my face, but knew better.  "Kiddo, why don't we go into that fort that you and Pops built and I'll tell you, okay?" I said.  It was going to break my heart even more telling Seth that he was not going to have a younger sibling anymore.  He will be so full of questions... and many of those I was not sure if I could answer him.

I nodded at her.  "Don't worry, dear, he'll understand more than you may realize.  I'm sure that him and his daddy are upstairs in that blanket fort with Arthur,' I said, shaking my head a little bit.  "And, naturally, Bill and Charlie's old room is all made up... do you want to rest?"

I heard Seth bringing Charlie upstairs. I smiled to my son who was just about as easy as a book to read. Seth appeared happy to show him everything we did today. When Seth took it easy he could easily get away with having a nap. So, I would let Charlie talk to me when he wanted to. I nodded to him as we made eye contact.

I shook my head at Molly, " Not right now actually.." I said as I smiled to her. " Anything I can do? " I asked her, " Help with lunch or something?" I asked her as I needed to do something to keep myself busy so I didn't over think what happened.

"Sure, I was just going to whip up some sandwiches for the boys," I said, looking up towards the stairs.  "I do hope Seth isn't being overwhelming for Bill... Arthur's up there..."  I knew Seth would be able to help them, but it would be hard to tell him about everything and be strong for him if Bill had not had a chance to grieve about it himself.

I nodded, yawning.  "Okay," I said, passing Pops and grinning at him.  "Here it is!" I opened the door to Uncle Ron's old bedroom and we had changed it into a blanket kingdom.  "Let's get into the middle and then you can tell me your secret."  I got down and crawled into the fort.  I heard Dad behind me.  I got to the middle and sat down on other blankets and waited for him to get cozy as well.  "So?  What is it?" I asked, curiuos.

I wanted to break away from Seth and go hug my dad, but I knew I could not.  Not yet anyways.  Dad had a knowing look in his eyes -- as if he knew already, but of course he did not.  He could just tell there was something wrong.  I sat down in the middle of the fort and looked at Seth, who looked so eager to know the big secret.  "Alright, kiddo, we got some bad news today," I started out quietly.  "You know that your mum was going to have a baby and you were going to be a big brother?  That's going to have to wait a little while longer.  We're not going to have a little brother or sister for you.  They had to go back to heaven..."  It was hard to get across to a child what a miscarriage was.  I did not want to tell him that it just was not happening because he would not unertand the sadness, but I also did nto want to go into morbid details about everything either.  I fought back tears as my son's face fell.

I nodded as my dad spoke to me.  I was so excited to be a big brother!  But now it was not going to happen?  I looked up at my dad.  "Why did they go back to heaven?  Were they just not ready to be a family?  Is it because I'm not going to be the baby's real big brother?" I asked all of these questions quickly.  Though she was my mum, Dora was not really my mum.  I had a feeling that was why we could not have a baby sibling... we would nto be a real family like everyone else.

I put my arm around him and shook my head.  "That's not it at all, buddy," I assured him.  "You will be a real big brother -- family isn't always blood.  You will love your little brother or sister so much when they get here.  But you're right, they just weren't ready to handle all of us Wealeys.  You know we get a little crazy."  I was glad that Seth had sort of given me an answer within his questions.

I yawned again and nodded.  "We are crazy," I agreed.  "Well, they don't have to come until they're ready.  Don't worry, Daddy, my little brother or sister will be watching how well you and mum take care of me and will want to come back soon."  I squeezed my dad's hand and moved slightly to lay down.  I was getting really tired.

My son nearly brought a fresh bout of tears to my eyes when he said that.  I kissed his forehead as he easily drifted off to sleep.  Of course he would not realize the depth of what had happened, but that was okay for now.  I crawled out of the blanket fort and had to find Dad.  It did not take me long to do so, I was pretty sure he had been waiting for me.  I put my hands in my pockets as I looked at him sadly.  "We lost the baby," I said to him, my voice cracking with emotion.

I smiled as Molly spoke, " im sure he's showing everything off." I said as my voice aas cracking. I attempted to clear my throat out to make it easier for molly to hear me. " Sandwiches sound great." I urged myself to go to the kitchen with her. " Molly did you ever worry about...this?" I asked her. With the seven children I was curious.

I bustled about the kitchen, pulling out the lunch meat and bread.  I summoned for all the trimmings to come out to the table -- such as the mayo, mustard, and the like.  I put my hand on my hip slightly as I turned to look at Dora.  "I worried more with Bill and with the younger two," I told her honestly.  "Bill because he was the first and I was fretting about everything."  I chuckled slightly adn shook my head.  Poor Arthur had to deal with me being so frantic.  "And then with Ron and Ginny because I myself was older and it seems to be a bit more common.  I cant' say that the worry was at the front of my mind, but it was certainly there."