Take a leap of Faith -- Christmas 1988

My brother and I were always extremely close.  I swear we were nearly as close as Fred and George.  We were not nearly as much jokesters as we were adventurous.  It was Christmas vacation and we were up in our bedroom just chilling.  I looked over at Charlie and I had to tell him.  "Hey mate, I've got some big news to tell you.  I haven't even told mum yet," I said suddenly since we hadn't been talking just reading and listening to some music.

I looked up from my quidditch magazine and tossed it on our desk.  Sitting up, I saw that twinkle in my brother's eyes that told me he was definitely up to something.  "Sure.  What's up?" I asked.  Ihad a feeling whatever it was, it was big.

I ran a hand through my hair and sighed. It was going to be hard leaving Charlie. I would miss my entire family, but Charlie the most. He would be the only one who would truly understand, though. We talked about leaving all the time and going to far off lands. "Well, depending on if I get enough NEWTs, I have a job with Gringott's," I explained to my brother. It was best to lead of slowly... let's drop the bomb of where only when necessary.

I laughed and said, "That's great!  Congrats, man!"  I was goign to get up and hug him but realized there was more.  I felt my smile fade a little as he continued to tell me more.

Merlin, this was difficult. I could only imagine telling Mum and Dad. "I won't be in Diagon Alley, though. Charlie... I'm doing what you and I have always dreamed of: I'm travelling to a completely different country. They said with seniority I could always try to come back, though." Like I would. I'm going to be living my dream! How could I deny that?

I shook my head at Bill.  "But why would you?  That's not the dream," I said, smiling at him.  As hard as i would be, I would not want him to turn his back on that.  I know I definitely wouldn't.  "Where are you headed?" I could -- and would -- be excited and supportive for Bill.  He was doing what we both wanted.  And I knew our parents and siblings would have a difficult time iwth this.  Only I would truly understand what he wanted to do and why he wanted to do it.

I grinned, glad that Charlie was taking this better than I expected. Perhaps it was due to our similarities of goals. "I would be off to Egypt," I explained. "But this is all contingent on if I pass my NEWTs." I did not want to get my hopes up too much... but I could not help but get excited about this possibility.

Egypt?  How awesome was that!  I stood up and hugged Bill.  "That's great!  And I really wouldn't worry about your NEWTs if I were you," I added.  "You'll pass them all with flying colors."  I was sure of that.  He had brains -- probably more so than Percy.  Though he would never admit he was smarter than our younger brother.  He didn't want to be labeled as the geek of the family... leave that to Perce.

Rolling my eyes, I plopped back down on my bed. Charlie always had confidence in me. I wish I could have that much confidence in myself sometimes. I stared at our ceiling a little bit before saing, "I just don't know how to tell Mum and Dad." I was the first one to be leaving the nest and it would be all the way to Egypt. That was not going to go over too well.

I sighed, grabbing my magazine again and laid back in bed.  "WEll, you tell me how that goes and give me pointers for when I do it," I replied with a grin on my face.  I was only a fifth year, but I had plans to get out of London.  I loved my family... but I wanted to explore the world.  That was something I would not be able to do if I stayed with the big family or hell, even had a family of my own.  I would be okay being a lone wolf out in the wilderness as long as it was filled with excitement and being able to do what I loved.

I reached for the pillow behind my head and chucked it over at Charlie. "You are of no help whatsoever, mate," I said, laughing at hte look on his face. he had not expected me to throw something at him. I shook my head... he always underestimated what I would do. That's how I always won.

That dang pillow hit me square in the face.  "Hey!" I said, keeping it.  I wasn't going to give him his ammunition back.  "Just wait to say anything to them until you kow for sure.  No use getting her all worked up if it wends up not working out."  I thought that sounded like a pretty good idea.  That's what I was doing anyways.  So far, so good.

And that was where my brother was sometimes smarter than me. "You are a genius sometimes," I said, feeling a little relieved. He always said I over think things sometimes... and I was beginning to think he was right. Though I wouldn't tell him that. I mean, yeah, I was probably postponing the inevitable, but I just wouldn't think about that part until the time came. Which was hopefully about six months away... so no use worrying about it now.

We sat in silence, both lost in our own thoughts.  Then I spoke up, "I want to go play with dragons."  Hagrid and I talked all the time about them.  I loved them the more we talked... I definitely had a soft spot in Hagrid's heart because of my interest.

I looked over at Charlie. "I thought you wanted to try to get into professional quidditch," I said. That's what he agreed with whenever anyone brought it up, at least. Had he been lying ot me? Oh, that was not going to fly.