If you could see yourself the way others do, you'd wish you were as beautiful as you -- Fall 1976

It had been a year or so since Remus and I had dated for a summer and broken up.  We, however, always stayed good friends.  Partially because of James, partially because we did not want to lose it.  It was hard seeing James and Sirius trying to set him up with other girls -- especially when I knew how Chloe felt for him, but I still had my feelings for him, too.  We just did not talk about such things.  I walked into the common room and saw Remus looking miserable -- it was that time of the month.  I walked over to him and sat down.  "Hey... how are you feeling?" I asked him, slipping my bag off of my shoulder and to the floor to give more room on the little couch we were on.

I looked away from the fire that was glowing in front of us and smiled at Ember.  "I'm fine," I said to her, the answer I normally gave to everyone but Sirius, James, and Peter.  But with the look I received upon saying it, I knew that Ember could not be fooled.  I sighed and shrugged.  "It never gets easier," I replied honestly.  "After having to deal with this month after month... year after year... you'd think it would."

I shook my head.  "Actually... I would think it'd get harder and harder," I said to him thoughtfully.  "Being over aware of the change and anticipating it more and more -- though in a bad way, obviously.  Something like this never gets easy.  But that's why you've got us."  I grinned at him and dug in my bag.  I pulled out some Honeydukes chocolate.  "Wanna split it?" I suggested, knowing he loved chocolate.

I chuckled and accepted it.  "Thanks," I said to her, taking a bite of it.  I could feel her eyes on me.  "What?" I asked, wiping away a couple of crumbs that had gotten onto the side of my mouth when I had bitten into the dark chocolate.

I just smiled and chewed my piece of the chocolate.  "It's nothing really," I said to him.  "It's just... well, you amaze me."  There was really no other way to put it.  I always had a difficult time understanding why he never thought himself good enough for anyone.  It was obvious he was attractive, he was intelligent, among other things.

I stopped chewing, surprised.  Once I gathered my senses again, I swallowed and shook my head.  "I think that you think too much of me," I assured her.  I felt my cheeks get a little pink because I could not believe that she thought I was amazing.  That was far too high of a compliment for me.

I rolled my eyes.  "You always think people think too much of you, Remus," I pointed out to him, nibbling on the chocolate I had left.  I looked away from him and into the flames of the fire.  "I just hope that... well, I hope that everyone helps you.  You know, us."

I looked over at her.  "You really have no idea," I assured her.  "I really never thought I'd have mates... so you guys proved me wrong on that accord.  And for that, I am grateful.  So trust me when I say that you lot help."

I grinned at him.  "Of course I'll trust you on that when it's a compliment towards me and the group," I teased.  "But in all seriousness... you are starting to realize that you don't poison everything you touch."  Oh yes, I used his words against him.

I stared at Ember, not entirely sure how I wanted to word my retort when she used my own words against me.  "I'm not entirely sure if that's true yet," I finally said.  I took another bite of chocolate and used that as an excuse not to say anything else.

I shook my head.  "You are so stubborn," I pointed out to him, sighing.  "Why don't you just realize you arent' as horrid as you think you are?"

I looked at Ember and sighed.  "Because you lot put way too much faith in me," I assured her.  If they knew what I had done in the past... they would not look at me the same.  The guys sort of knew different things about what I had done with my furry little problem, but not Ember.

I laughed at Remus and adjusted myself so I was leaning against the arm of the couch where my toes were nearly ready to burrow under Remus's thigh.  "Remus, we do not give you too much faith," I said, rolling my eyes.  "You are a great guy... I don't know why you doubt yourself so much."

"Perhaps it's because of the monstrous thing that I turn into once a month," I said sarcastically, rolling my eyes at Ember's never ending optimism.  It was nice to have, but at the same time... I could not handle it sometimes.

I sighed heavily at Remus.  "Sometimes I wish you would just listen to us, though," I said to him, shaking my head.  "But if you didn't brood so much about this, then you wouldn't be you."