This ain't love, it's clear to see -- December 1976

I felt really bad for doing this this close to the holidays, but I was done being second best.  "Hey Ems, can we talk?" I questioned, sitting down beside her in the Great Hall.  I saw the look that James gave me but I did not care.  I was sure that he would kill me, but why stay together when we were not happy?

I looked up from my toast that I was smothering in jam and smiled at Jeremy.  The look on his face, however, made my smile falter.  "Yeah, what's up?" I asked lightly, but I knew that tone of voice.  Remus and I had it at the end of last summer when we broke up.  I knew what was coming.  I started to prepare myself to keep my composure.

I looked around and realized that there were some people watching us.  I stood up and took her hand, taking her out into the corridor outside of the great hall.  "I don't want others to be watching and eavesdropping," I told her, hoping that I might be able to do this without causing a huge scene.

I nodded when he said that, but was not sure what to do next.  Was I supposed to open this break up conversation?  He was the one who wanted to do it, not me.  "Okay," I said just to say something when he kept looking at me in an expectant manner.  I was not going to make this easy for him.

This was a lot mroe difficult that I initially thought it was going to be.  I loosened the Gryffindor tie around my neck because my nerves were getting to me.  "Ems... I don't really know how to say this without hurting you," I told her.  "I don't want to do that, but forgive me for lacking the tact that I should have for saying what I'm about to say."  I did not want us to hate each other after this.

I crossed my arms and looked at him expectantly.  "Just get on with it, Jeremy," I said, purposely avoiding using his nickname.  I was just wishing that he would get it over with.

I sighed slightly and looked her into her beautiful eyes.  "Ember... I'm tired of being second best," I said quietly.  "I've tried and tried of coming in first with you... but there's really nothing more I can do.  I'm done... I can't do it anymore.  We're over."  I really wanted her to say something to change my mind, though.

I bit my lip and stared at him.  "Okay," I said, wondering what I was going to do about any of this.  I wanted to go upstairs and talk to Chloe and Lily about Jeremy, but I had class.  And I did not want him to realize how upset he made me.

I could not believe her.  I almost wanted her to fight back for me, but then again... this was not at all surprising.  "I wouldn't mind still being friends, though," I said, though I was not entirely sure if we could do that.

That felt like a slap in the face, but I could not let it show.  I nodded at him and found my voice.  "Oh yes," I said, nodding.  "It'd be stupid not to be friends."  It woudl be stupid to lie, too... and here I was lying like the best of them.

It was hard to tell what Ember was thinking, but it was nice that she was being so mature about this -- I thought that maybe she would freak out on me.  "Yeah, espeically with classes we have together," I said, nodding at her.

"Which, speaking of," I said, trailing off slgihtly.  I sighed.  "I better go grab my things... I'll see you in class, okay?" I said to him lightly.  I flashed him a smile and went off.  This was going to be so difficult!

I nodded, watching he rleave.  It was hard to tell what Ember was thinking -- which was nothing new, if I was going to be honest with myself.  I sighed and went back into teh Great Hall where my things were.  I was so going to have to answer to James, but this was beyond my control when it came to Ember's feelings.  I only ended things because it was obvious she was not interested in me.

When I arrived to class, Jeremy was not there yet.  Nor was half the class.  I sighed, not really caring.  This was going to be a long day.  I ended up sitting in my normal seat.  Jeremy could move if he wanted to.  I got out the homework that was supposed to be handed in today and waited.

I finally got to class, seeing my normal seat was not taken.  How odd would it be if I didn't sit there?  Sighing, I moved and set my bag down.  "Hey," I said to Ember as normally as I could.