Tonight your memory burns like a fire -- October 1991

It was rought still, being without my dad.  I was wanting to go to my childhood home which was just around the lake from where Chloe, the kids, and I lived.  I knocked lightly as I opened the door.  It was odd to see boxes packed up.  I found Cathie in the kitchen, tears in her eyes.  "Hey... are you okay?" I asked, putting an arm around her shoulders.  I led her to a chair to sit dow.  It was still difficult to be in here without seeing myd ad's lifeless body on the floor.  I had a feeling that it was that same reason Cathie was in tears while packing up the dishes.

I was grateful that Remus had shown up when he did.  I put a hand on his shoulder.  "I'm alright, Remus," I tried to assure him.  "There are just so many memories here... well, more for you than either me or Penny, but still."  I shook my head and wiped at my eyes.

I pulled up a chair next to her and sat down.  "Don't discredit the time the three of you were here together.  You've been here a little over ten years... that's nearly Penny's entire life thus far," I pointed out.  I put a hand over hers.  By the time they got back together, I was married and just had Will.

Remus was right.  I smiled at him and squeezed his hand.  "Adn this can't be easy for you, either, Remus.  Being in here where you..." I trialed off, unable to continue saying it.

"This will always be his place.  I won't let it fall into any wrong hands," I assured her.  I could not let this place end up in just any familiy.  He left it to me.  I have gone over and over with Cathie that she could stay, but I understood why she was moving.

I stood back up.  I really needed to get packing again.  "I know you'll do everything you can with this old place that'd make your dad proud, sweetie," I told him as I put the dishes in bubble wrap before they placed themselves neatly in the box.

I smiled and stood to help her pack.  "How is Penny handling this?" I asked.  I saw Penny at school, but she was closer to Cathie than to me to talk about this to.

I shrugged.  "As well as any young girl who lost her dad can do," I said quietly.  "It's hard, but she's managing.  I've seen her put herself into schoolwork, but never like this.  It's all she talks about."  I wave dmy wand and the box with teh dishes closed.  I let all the cabinets close themselves with another wave.  "That's it for the kitchen."

I carried the box out of the kitchen.  I had never seen the place look so empty.  That was the only room that was left... for obvious reasons.  It was difficult bein gin the kitchen.  I still saw him sitting there on the ground.  "Let me help you get to your new place," I offered.  I did nto want Cathie to do this on her own.  If Dad found out... that thought never finished.  He was gone.

I put a hand on his shoulder.  "I'll be fine, honey.  Are you handling this okay?" I asked him.  There was no way Remus was handling his father's death well.  I would not let him leave here without talking about it.  he ahd to be strong for little Will and Lucy... but not for me.

I set down the box and looked at her, tears having come to my eyes.  I shook my head.  Cathie was the mum I never had.  I was not handling this well at all.  I let her wrap her arms around me and I hugged her back, tears falling down my cheeks.  "I miss him... so much," I sobbed.  It broke my heart to no longer have my dad around anymore.

I held onto my son tightly as he cried.  "I know, sweetie," I whispered.  "We all do... he was so proud of you.  Always spoke nonstop about you adn your family." I pulled away and wiped his tears form his cheeks.  I kept my hands on his face.  "You were his pride and joy."  Of course he loved Penny, too, but Remus was his.  No one coudl ever speak ill of him.

I could not help but chuckle.  "He always wanted ot keep every little thing I did -- whether it was homework or finger paints," I said.  I did help her get thigns all inter her one pack -- it was charmed so it fit all the boxes so she could Portkey to the new place.  While we organized, we continued to talk about Dad.  It was rather nice, to remember the good times.  I ended up going toback to Hogwarts happy for a change this school year.

I laughed, understanding.  "Trust me... he has plenty for Penny and Nate, too," I said to him quietly.  We continued to pack.  "Remus... befor eyou go, can you talk to Nate?  I'm really worried about hiim with the move."  It was really a lot to ask of my eldest, but still... Nate looked up to him and I knew that Remus would be able to talk to him.  Right now, he was rather angry with me for making us move sitll.

I smiled at Mum and nodded.  "Yes, of course," I said to her.  "I should have known that he would need some convincing from his big brother."  I loved using that phrase; I could not help it.