New beginings...where to start..tbd

I nodded in agreement. "But when will Father get board with us and decide we're doing something wrong?" I said his thoughts out loud with a sigh. "More specifically, that I'm doing something wrong." Usually it started with me after there'd been a break. The treats Mother sent were wonderful but I was still waiting, it felt like the calm before the storm, like always.

I sighed.  "Maybe I'll just do something so terribly against what Father wants to save you the hassle of dealing with him," I said, only half joking.  I hated that Juniper always got the brunt of his anger.

I shook my head, "Don't do that, it's not worth it." I gave a little sigh, "Trust me." I knew what would've happened if Draco had told Father I'd been talking to a Black would've set off the storm again, so I was glad we got a bit more time of peace before that happened. It was only a matter of time though, and neither if us knew how long this storm may last.

I chuckled slightly, though with no humor in it.  "I know poking the bear isn't a good thing," I started, "but every now and then I wish we'd know when the storm is going to rage... it'd give us a warning."  I looked at her with a bit of a cocky grin.  "Besides, I can be a daredevil and see what he'd do."  Of course taht would probably not happen... no one purposely upset Father.

I raised my eyebrow, "No." I said simply but I knew what he meant about wanting to know when he would get set off again. "A warning would be nice, maybe you should tell him I was talking with a Black. Then we would know for sure."

I shook my head.  "There is no way I'm going to throw you under the bus," I said, thinking that was ridiculous.  "I should if I knew what was good for me, but I'm not.  It'd have to be something worse than talking to Black for me to do something like that.  Now... if it were Potter, Granger, or Weasley... I may not have a choice."  I knew Father would hate to see either of us hanging around with a filthy little mudblood, the famous boy who lived, and the scum of the wizarding world.

I rubbed my free arm up and down my other arm, glancing at the ground. "I guess so." Harry, Ron and Hermione were my friends but Draco was right, a Black was one thing but he would have no choice if he found out about the others. I would just have to stop talking to them.

Okay, now I knew something was going on.  I stopped again.  "Juniper Renee," I started, using her full name to let her know I was down to business.  "What is going on?  I may seem ignorant and egotistical, but I do notice those small things you do when there's something on your mind like that."  I did the same things.  I was just glad that I had gotten rid of the habit of sticking my tongue out while concentrating -- well, rather I had been informed by Father that that was not how real wizards did magic and that I needed to stop doing so no matter what.  Or else.  And when you had a father like mine, you listened -- no matter if you barely knew you were doing it or not.

I bit my lip and looked at him, hating the fact that He could read my tells. I couldn't tell him out right what was going on in my mind but I thought a side approach might work better. "What if Harry and them aren't as bad as you think?" I started with that and decided to judge how Draco reacted to see what I would say next.

I about dropped the books I was holding onto.  My stomach knotted and I just stared at Juniper.  I felt the jealousy that I had bottled inside that I would never admit to anyone of having towards those three insolent beings.  They were real friends, they had real families -- well, Potter had most of a real family now at Hogwarts -- and they would never stab each other in the backs.  They did not have to live up to abnormally high expectations and live on a narrow path of what was to be done and what was not allowed.  They did not have Father.  "What are you saying, Juniper?" I asked, hating how I sounded like him.  He never used any shortened versions of our names.  Not that mine could be shortened, but still.  No nicknames... nothing.  Always our proper names.  And now that was how I sounded.  Great.

I bit my lip harder, and rubbed my hand more vigorously up and down. "I'm just wondering what if they're not as bad as you think. Maybe they're nice and want to make more friends. Maybe they okay people that do nice things for each other. Maybe they're real friends." I tended to either shut up or ramble when I got nervous, depending on who I was with.

That just angered me so much.  "First, they're in Gryffindor.  Second, it's Potter, Weasley, and Granger.  Do I need a third?" I asked, fuming.  I could read between the lines of what she was saying.  She must be at least speaking with them.  Did she not just hear what I had said?  I could not keep this from Father.  If I did... I knew what he would do to both of us.

I hated when Draco yelled at me but I deserved it. "But they're nice." I said softly, my head towards the floor.

I could not believe her.  "Do you even realize what you're doing?" I asked, exasperated.  I started to pace for a couple of moments, then I stopped.  I looked at her.  "I can give you a week to end ties with them.  But that's all I can do, Juniper.  Father is going to be livid..." And, not that I would say it to her aloud, but I was slightly disappointed in her.  She knew better.  Yes, they may actually be nice.  I did, actually, find the Weasley twins quite funny, but I would never show it or say it to a soul.  I knew what was at stake -- my own health.  And now Juniper put both of us in a position like this.

"But..."I began but my face fell as I sighed. I knew he would be mad, that's why I didn't want to tell him but he had given me a week. "I know. One week." I agreed. I sighed again, I knew he would be disappointed in me but I was lost and they helped me. I just wanted to repay them somehow but it looked like that wouldn't be the case. "Does this mean no more games night?" I tried to turn the conversation less serious again, hoping Draco would still want to hang out with me.