Like a poet needs the pain--TBD

I had gone out by the lake to think. Things are happening everywhere and it seems to be taking a toll on everyone. Knowing that we're not really safe at all, I write everything. It seemed writing is my outlet and I love it. Makes everything stop. I had started crying knowing that no one here is really safe I told a few girls where I was going to let someone know where I was. It was terrible what happened to Olivia and Will. They were ambushed on the grounds. I wanted to know why they were able to get on the grounds. " You know that feeling that things will never be the same....I know it too." I said to my book. " It's a pain in the ass to need to look over your shoulder...to know that anything you could be doing could be the last thing you do....everything you have need to treasure it. No matter what the cost. " I paused and looked out to the water. " I wish I could help people more...I want to know how everyone here copes. I don't know how that group handles being in the public eye. How anyone handles anything...it must be ridiculous. I put my book on the ground beside me, running my hands through my hair.

I was getting tired of people asking me how I am doing. Something along those lines it was just getting to repetitive. I understand people were being kind or whatnot. I was just wanting someone to talk to me. To really just talk about anything really. I left the castle and found a spot by the water as I overheard someone talking. I looked to my left, I saw Emelyn sitting by the tree. I smiled over, " Hey, how're you?" I asked her, she looked concerned. " Everything all right?"

I was brought back to reality, " Oh hey I'm sorry...off in space." I told him. " I'm alright just thinking. " I explained. Just trying to think how things can be so bad...but can't really say that to him. " I was debating on flying but I didn't want to go by myself." I told him giving him a soft smile. " Care to join me?"