No one likes to be alone -- January 1976

I was still in shock; Sirius had run away from home.  I had started to fall closer and closer with Bella and the others:  Avery, McNair, Malfoy... the older group of students.  I knew that I was falling into a dark pit.  I was just listening to what I was told to do and also what I thought was best.  Sirius's route, though brave, was one I could not risk to take.  I did not have his courage.  I did not have his strength.  He was the one who gave it to me and now he was gone.  He abandoned me.  He just left me. 

I sat on a sofa in the common room and twirled my wand around in my fingers, making the fire in the fireplace grow bigger and bigger and then letting it fade.  I had not meant to do that, but I did not stop it from happening either.  I knew it was only a matter of time when one of my housemates approached me.  It would be either one of the darker lot with which I had been gaining trust from or it would be my best mate, Narcissa, or it would be October who had the uncanny ability to figure out when I needed to talk.