The truth can lighten a heavy heart - Late September 1991

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Post  Juniper Malfoy Matthews on Wed Jun 18, 2014 12:32 pm

Cassie and I were sitting next to each other in transfigurations, practicing the matchstick to needle spell, when Professor McGonagall came up. She was seeing how everyone one in the class was making out. I smiled up at her. "We've been practicing Professor. Look." I concentrated on the matchstick, did the spell and watched it become a beautiful silver needle. "Well done Miss. Malfoy." No adult had ever praised me before. I've never felt so good about myself. I smiled over at Cassie, about to tell her to show Professor McGonagall what she could do, when I saw her shocked face. It took me only a moment to realize what had happened. She had head my last name. I never raised my hand in class so I was never called on and this was the first time the professor had addressed me in front of Cassie. She had heard my last name and recognized it. The good feeling left and my face fell as I realized I could no longer protect Cassie from friending out we were related. I had to resign myself to the fact that I could still protect her from the Malfoy's, even if it meant me not hanging out with her anymore. She wouldn't want to, now that she knew who I was.
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Post  Cassiopeia Tonks on Wed Jun 18, 2014 12:50 pm

I smiled as Juniper perfectly demonstrated the transfiguration spell. However I froze when I heard Professor McGonagall call her 'Miss Malfoy.' She is Draco Malfoy's sister... No twin! What did Dora say about the Malfoy's? That his - their - mum was a Black, which means.... We are cousins! I could feel Juniper's gaze on me but I was too shocked to respond. Has she known all along? I mean, she has known my last name all along... I can't help but feel a little hurt by her avoidance of telling me that we are family... I will have to pull her aside after class.
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Post  Juniper Malfoy Matthews on Thu Jun 19, 2014 12:48 pm

The rest of class seemed to last forever and once we were finally dismissed, I grabbed my bag and ran out the door. I had to go see Draco, he would tell me that this was a good thing, I could stop being her friend, since she wouldn't want to be mine now anyway, and still protect her from Father. This would also help me since I'm sure Father wouldn't approve me hangout out with anymore from that family, especially since they lived as Muggles. I didn't care about that, but Father sure did. I heard her calling my name and tried to ignore it but I really couldn't. I stopped, took a shaky breath and turned towards her. "What do you want Cassie?" I sounded slightly broken, even to me. I needed friends, beside Draco since he couldn't hang out with me as much, but who would want to be friends with me? Draco was so proud of our Malfoy name which I tried to hide it as best as I could. I couldn't stand to lose Cassie as a friend but what choice did I have? She found out the truth and I didn't want to see her get hurt.
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Post  Cassiopeia Tonks on Thu Jun 19, 2014 2:31 pm

Thankfully I had caught her before she disappeared from my view. "Come with me" I say grabbing her arm and pulling her down a hallway in the oppositd direction of the rest of the student body. When I found a suitable empty classroom, I pulled Juniper in with me and shut the door. I turned to look at my new found cousin, trying to figure out where to begin. "Why? Why not tell me yourself? You've known we were cousins this whole time and didn't bother to tell me?" I say app of this quietly, as I wasn't angry, just... confused and hurt.
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Post  Juniper Malfoy Matthews on Fri Jun 20, 2014 11:13 am

I closed my eyes, felling horrible about everything, but how could I explain all of this to her? I sighed as I opened my eye, attempting to pick my words carefully. "I didn't want you to find out because I wanted to protect you from us. There is so much you don't know Cassie, so much you don't need to know." I shook my head slightly, forcing the tears that were threatening to fall away. "I just don't want to see you get hurt."
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Post  Cassiopeia Tonks on Fri Jun 20, 2014 2:12 pm

"I- I can understand that, and respect it" I say, choosing my words carefully. "However, I don't want to see you hurt either. First as a friend, now as family, I want to protect you too! I may be naive about a lot of things due to my upbringing, but I know family. And to always help, guide, protect, and love them." I put my hand to Juniper's cheek and brush away her tears, giving her a small smile.
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Post  Juniper Malfoy Matthews on Sat Jun 21, 2014 9:00 pm

I took a step back and shook my head, I didn't want her to touch me right now. "You don't understand." I grunted in frustration, I just needed her to understand. "It's not your upbringing that makes you naive Cassie. You may know family but you don't know my family." I tried to explain. "Nor will you." I let that hang in the air for a moment and saw she looked like she might protest. "I'm just trying to protect you." I told her desperately. Couldn't she see I was giving her an out with this? A way so she wouldn't have to be my friend anymore? She wouldn't want to now that she knew the truth.
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Post  Cassiopeia Tonks on Sat Jun 21, 2014 9:14 pm

"I think I can make my own decisions about who I decide to be friends with and who not to. You have not given me a good enough reason to convince me to be anything but your friend, so if you are so convinced that I can't be your friend, I want the whole story. Then I will make my own decisions. Even if you wouldn't want to be my friend anymore, I will still be there if you need me." I hope that didn't come out too harsh, but even if it did, it would make her listen better. "You say I don't understand, so help me to understand!" I say pleadingly. I don't want to loose her as a friend. She's the first one that I have had. I don't know how I would take it if she decided to not be my friend. I would always look out for her no matter what. I just want to cry, but I hold it in.
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Post  Juniper Malfoy Matthews on Tue Jun 24, 2014 10:07 am

"This is not a decision you make lightly." I warned her darkly. "Not when it comes to me." I let my head fall back, balled my hands into fists, shaking them slightly and grunted. Couldn't she see I was just trying it help her? The only way I knew how? I wanted to be mean to her, to make her mad at me so she wouldn't like me, but I couldn't do that. Draco was better at that. I had to push her away from me to keep her safe or Father could use her against me. He had started using me to make sure Draco did what he wanted him to. Sometimes, I thought that might be the only thing Father liked about me, that he could use me. That's why Draco and I don't have very many friends, we don't want people to get hurt because of us. I shook my head to clear it. "Why do you think I don't like talking about my family Cassie? We don't have movie nights, or spend holidays laughing while we open presents." I wasn't going to give her specifics but I would let her assume the worst. I knew I sounded harsh but I just needed her to see why I was doing this. She may be my cousin but she was a Tonks, she didn't have the misfortune of being a Malfoy. That was Draco and I and Draco and I alone. She didn't need to know our Father. I threw my hands up and let them fall back down. "I'm trying to do what's best for you here."
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Post  Cassiopeia Tonks on Tue Jun 24, 2014 10:28 am

"I know I can't change the past, or change your home life, but I can try to make some aspects easier. I know its not something to take lightly, but you are also family. I take family very seriously. I understand how you are trying to protect me, but I want to be here for you. I know its a risk, but the benefits are much better. I gain a cousin and a friend that I have never had before, and it doesn't matter to me what your parents are like. I may never meet them if you don't want me to. I am okay with this, I just need you in my life." I don't know what else to say. I don't know how to convince her that I just want to have her in my life. I try to will the tears in my eyes to hold off, but one tear escapes.
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Post  Juniper Malfoy Matthews on Thu Jun 26, 2014 11:24 am

I sighed when I saw a tear escape. "Please don't cry Cassie, I'm not trying to be mean on purpose. I just don't want to see you get hurt." I said desperately as I shook my head slightly. "You're right, nothing will change anything when it comes to me and the benefits are great, but the risks are real. I don't want you to get hurt just because you're my friend. That's what I'm trying to be to you right now, a friend. Friends look out for each other right?" I raised my hands again and let them fall as I signed. I didn't know what else to say on that front. "You're never going to meet my parents. I would never put you through that, I wouldn't put anyone through that." My parent didn't need to know that I was friends with someone on Mothers side of the family. They would punish me for being Cassie's friend, punish Draco for not telling me to not be her friend, and who knows what they might do to Cassie. I shook my head to clear it. "My family's bad news Cassie. Nothing good ever comes from being friends with Malfoy, that's why Draco and I don't really have friends. I'm just trying to push you away for your own good." I said, desperate for her to understand.
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Post  Cassiopeia Tonks on Thu Jun 26, 2014 12:23 pm

I could tell she was upset too, but i couldn't help but feel hurt. "You say you don't want me to get hurt, but what do you think you pushing me away is doing?" I say in a small voice. I wrap my arns around myself to try and quell the pain in my chest. I don't know how to convince her to change her mind... "I-I guess I will just go now." I head to the door, my head down.
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Post  Juniper Malfoy Matthews on Mon Jun 30, 2014 10:54 am

I could've let her leave, should've let her walk out the door, but I just couldn't. "Cassie, wait." I sighed as I watched her turn around. "I'm not trying to hurt you, I'm just trying to protect you. This is what's best for both of us" I sounded defeated, I couldn't push her away though. It appeared that I needed her as much, if to more, then she needed me. I sighed. "My parents can't find out we're friends. They won't find out from me or Draco, we're good at keeping secrets." If I couldn't push her away, I would still protect her from my family. I vowed that my parents would never find out about her or that we were friends. I wasn't sure if Draco knew how close we were but if he did find out, I would make sure he wouldn't tell either.
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Post  Cassiopeia Tonks on Mon Jun 30, 2014 11:52 am

"Thats all I ask. I will guard our friendship with all my heart!" I couldn't resist, I grabbed Juniper and gave her a hug, clinging to her as if she would disappear. "I love you Juney, you my best friend. I'm glad you are in my life. I know we have really only known each other for a month, but it feels like we have always been friends."
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Post  Juniper Malfoy Matthews on Wed Jul 02, 2014 12:11 pm

I tensed slightly when she hugged me, not because it was Cassie, but because I wasn't used to hugs unless it was Draco, or sometimes, Mother. I smiled slightly, but I was still nervous about what out friendship could potentially do to us but for the moment, I would be happy. I put my arms around her to return the hug. "I feel the same way but you have to trust me on something's Cassie. If I say we can't see each other for a few days, we can't see each other. If I randomly ignore you in the halls, I have my reasons. I'm just trying to protect you okay? I don't mean anything by it." The last thing I needed was for Father to make a surprise visit and have Cassie hurt when I didn't say hi or wave to her if was passed each other in the halls.
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